Guess WHAT??????
I GET MY TRAVEL PLANS THIS WEEK!!!! what
 the fweak just happened(kid history). i feel like i just got here then 
WHAMO!! oh hey you're leaving. say whaaa? whatever. ill conquer it or 
die. IM pumped tho!!! i can't believe ive almost been here 4 weeks the 
days have flown this place rocks! Im so glad i inspired stake conference
 :) i knew i was an inspiration character. and yeeeaaah sorry dad! i 
asked them but i forgot to write it down so i'll have to get a letter to
 you this week! sorrrry! im pretty slow at things sometimes but ill get 
on it. Yeah my district is made up of babes. i feel like an ugly 
duckling. not really. but seriously who looks good when they wake up? 
THEY DO! who looks like the walking death? I DO!! zombie lady coming 
through... let me wipe off all my smeared mascara that's makes me look 
like something worthy of the zombie apocalypse. ill have to send another
 letter and look at the picture before i can tell you their names. hahah
 ok so about me these 2 weeks since i feel like you've missed my whole 
life since they changed my p day. first off there is an elder named 
zimmerman who has the total hots for my kasama who is claimed!!  she has
 a boy friend. before she told him this it had come to him calling her 
pet names like ballerina girl (shes a dance ps) anyway she told him and 
now they're just bosom friends  but he's such a sweetheart. hahahahhah 
we'd count how many times he'd pop out of no where and talk to her a 
day. it was li;ke 8. also we have a "investigator" named patricio and 
you know how you can get things engraved with names here for free? well 
you can. and they did. but with patricio. hahahha they gave our 
teacher/investigator with a fake name his own book of mormon. it was 
funny. we are creepy loving missionaries. So the other day we were 
playing volleyball and gym... me being the awesome person i am was 
kicked in the face with the ball and also had it spiked into my face. 
yay. team. hahah it was soft tho so i didn't totally look like id been 
abused. That's what i get for being lazy this week and not running and 
working out and becoming the new p90x tony lady trainer. eh. tony is 
over rated anyhow. sorry this letter is basically a letter composed of 
all my funny moments so thats what you get cuz that's what i concentrate
 on. i carry my journal around with me during the day and write down 
whatever funny thing happens or is in the least bit quote worthy. for 
example: 
we were talking at the breakfast table and sister porter with her 
pneumonia like symptoms was dying and she kept saying she felt like a 
sloth, then randomly she says "did you know sloths are so dumb, they 
will grab their arm thinking its a tree branch and fall to their death?"
 who even KNOWS that??? hahahahah we were dying. like bad. she has lots 
of random fun facts. she also said you have to tip turkeys over if 
they're drinking water as it rains cuz they'll just stand there with 
their mouth open until they drown. stupid birds. anyway we have a quote 
wall and it's really quite fun. really. if you concentrate on the good 
moments in the day it makes your day like triple the happiness lever as 
usual. try it. write down every little funny thing that happens. its 
great. 
so you know how thomas edison said something like "i didn't fail, i
 found 2000 ways not to make a lightbulb" yeah well i can top you 
thomas!! "im rachel and ive found 20000 ways not to speak tagalog and 
butcher it past the point of recognition. im skilled like that. but not 
to worry i can manage a few basic, elemenary sentences to get me 
through. reminds me of when dad was all. this is all you need to know in
 spanish "donde esta el bano" got tit! haha so basically im in business 
with the latinos and the pilipinas. 
the other day we were on mormon.org and we just started stalking everyone and their dogs profiles, let it be known you don't need fb with mormon.org.
 we found everyones boy friends. except mine. eli hasn't made one yet. 
which reminds me im so mad i missed his grunts and slobbery kisses. I 
MISS MY NEPHEW. and all ya'll too :) This week consisted of mostly 
sister porter dying slowly. as i stated she had a temp of 103 one day 
and went to the instacare then followed migraines and other stuff. mean 
while sister storey and i made a hobo corner in the hall and basically 
looked like the most spiritual homeless creatures you could find. ive 
got to figure out how to get you pictures so you can see it. we 
seriously saw daylight at dinner and squinted at it like we just emerged
 from a cave we'd lived in our whole life and took of some tinted sun 
glasses. it was like sun? what is sun? 
word to the wise. you think men look good in suits with tags? HA! 
Try normal clothes. pretty sure street clothes are the most attractive 
thing ive seen since the dawn of time. you know what else is nice? 
sercret agents. last night i dreamed i was a secret agent with a fine 
looking partner in justice and we scaled the brooklyn bride which had 
made its way to seattle oddly enough trying to ditch some bad guys which
 we eventually did through some skilled driving. it was quite nice. 
reminds me of the time we went into public. as missionaries. yeah you 
heard me. we went out to go to the byu pharmacy and it was the oddest 
thing ever. i really did feel like i stepped out of a bubble and had a 
mantle placed on me. we were all feeling like weirdos so we said hi to 
about every person we met and creeped out some little kids. hoo ra for 
us doing our duty. it was a super cool feeling., not going to lie. they 
were real people!! not like ive seen those before.  anyway ive got to go
 but just know ng espiritu santo sa lakas and this place is istig!!! 
love the gospel. love this work. and love to learn. AND love bringing 
true happiness to others and myself. its great. 
mahal kita
sister hansen :)
 
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